Categories Addiction

Tequila diet. So far I’ve lost two years”…

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Tequila diet. So far I’ve lost two years”…

For the last few years of my using, my addiction spiraled completely out of control. I was a hazardous hot fucking mess, that didn’t know whether she was batting or bowling! I sold my business, packed up my shit & moved to the party island of Ibiza where I thought it would be socially acceptable for me to float around completely off my fucking chops without anyone batting an eyelid. Everyone there just thought I was a ‘party girl’. The real truth? Behind closed doors I’d been an addict since my early teens. This started with me using substances recreationally at first, to daily use to help me control my eating disorder, & unbeknown to me, feed my drug addiction…

The girl in this photo used to have amphetamines instead of coffee, drink tequila for breakfast (with a wedge of orange for one of her 5 a day!), snort ANYTHING she could get her fucking hands on & knock herself out every evening with enough painkillers & Valium to take a horse down. She was in & out of toxic relationships. She defined herself by numbers on a scale. She was a lost soul without passion or purpose. She was slowly killing herself with her self destructive behavior. She was emotionally done, mentally drained & spiritually deceased. Her life priorities were self centered, revolving around anything that brought her instant pleasure. Everyday she would numb herself into oblivion on her endless quest of depraved, drunken, drugged up debauchery & hedonistic escapism. She couldn’t stop drugs. She couldn’t stop drinking. This girl was ME…

I don’t recognize this girl anymore, but she will always be a part of me. Looking back it’s hard to believe it took me so fucking long to realize I had a problem! I’d been using for that many a moon, it was just as much a part of my daily routine as brushing my teeth. My life now couldn’t be any further away from these days! I’m on a journey to become the best version of myself mentally, spiritually & physically. I love the person I’ve become so far, because I fought like fuck to become her. I will be forever grateful for my sobriety. Sober life is fucking beautiful…

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